Emotional competences in sales

BRUNO VACCIANO, HBR MAY 2023: https://www.hbritalia.it/mondo-formazione/2023/05/29/news/le-competenze-emotive-nelle-vendite-15560/

The great preparation and knowledge for business set him apart from others. Educated, always up-to-date on current issues, he often and willingly confronted his advisers and ministers. There was one challenge, however, that put him to the test: public speaking.

It is 1925 and the Duke of York, future King George VI, is in Perth at an official state dinner. Every part of the speech in honour of the visit has been studied in great detail. The crowd waits silently for his words, but they do not come out. Only the notes of the band cover the awkwardness that descends on the hall.

Between knowing and knowing how, there is a place where emotions can take over.

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Giorgio VI is the representation of the authentic modern leader who faces with strength and courage that ailment that plagued him when he had to expose himself and put his face to it. However, many of us, while not suffering from stuttering, experience similar conditions. It has happened to all of us to know in detail what to do and fail to do it.

Salespeople know this well: when faced with a difficult customer, even though they are aware of communication techniques, how they should rephrase the objection and ask the questions, they fail because something is quivering in their gut and they are unable to handle it.

Today’s professionals have to navigate the ever-changing marketplace, distinguish themselves from the competition, create value for customers and win their trust, maintain long-term relationships, overcome objections and resistance, handle the pressure to achieve sales targets, relate effectively with stakeholders inside and outside the company, and motivate their team. Just reading it takes your breath away! If explaining the technical characteristics of a product used to be enough to be fairly successful, today we are aware that this is no longer the case. The consumer buying process has changed shape and the life of salespeople has become more arduous.

Stepping through the “self help and personal growth” department of a bookshop will not, however, make us successful salesmen. Pre-conceived recipes do not work, and if we want to learn how to apply those tricks effectively, we have to go deeper.

We need a change of perspective that makes the development of emotional skills its foundation.

Neuro-scientific research in the emotional-behavioural field has made great strides and we now have valuable information on the role emotions play in decision-making processes and the impact emotional intelligence has on performance, particularly in complex contexts of interaction with others.

The main references in this area are Daniel Goleman’s emotional intelligence model and Paul Ekman’s research on emotions.

Navigating between the four quadrants of Goleman’s model serves as a compass for salespeople wishing to cope with the difficulties of the profession in an ever-changing world:

1. Self-awareness: understanding one’s own selling style and how it is perceived by the customer, combined with knowledge of personal blind spots to avoid repeating the same mistakes.
2. Self-management: ability to act rather than react, remaining lucid even in the face of what usually makes us lose control.
3. Awareness of others: understanding the interlocutor and building trust, through communication that adapts to the client’s style and overcomes objections, particularly unspoken ones.
4. Relationship management: honing the ability to express oneself as a true leader.

In order to develop these skills, it is essential to know the emotional world closely.

“Emotion gets in our way when we don’t know how to handle it,” says Paul Ekman, who leaves us with an invaluable wealth of information that can be applied to any human interaction activity. Valuable information for recognising first and foremost one’s own emotions and, above all, for applying effective regulation strategies that enable a sales professional to reach his or her full potential.

Emotions move people. Emotional skills move sales leaders.